Family Mediation - FAQ

I am having problems, is mediation likely to help me and if so, how?
Mediation helps you make your own decisions and reduce conflict. Mediation helps parents co-operate over children and discuss their needs and concerns. It helps you and your partner understand the financial situation by pulling together information and documentation and then working out possible terms for a settlement based on individual circumstances and needs.

Mediators can provide information about the divorce process and general principles the court will follow in making its Orders, and the process helps you solve your problems instead of a Judge deciding issues for you.

A mediator can often help come up with ideas and solutions that you have not thought about. He or she makes no decisions but often offers suggestions. You will not be put under any pressure to agree anything against your will. The mediator will keep discussions on track and help, so far as possible, create a civilised and constructive atmosphere. Discussions are informal and each party has an equal opportunity to explain his or her priorities and concerns.


If I go to mediation, will there be pressure to make me stay with my partner, or for us to get back together again?
No. The aim of mediation is not to stop couples splitting up, it is to help them work out mutually acceptable decisions and future arrangements. Often this happens when one partner has already left or want to separate. However, if both partners want to consider staying together the mediator will usually encourage them to go to Relate or a similar counselling service.


What are the benefits of family mediation?

  • you keep control
  • reduces conflict
  • less harm to children
  • improved communication
  • results that work
  • a problem shared
  • help from a neutral third party
  • a tried and tested process
  • confidentiality
  • 'without prejudice'
  • can help retain relationships eg as parents
  • concerns can be raised and addressed promptly
  • a framework in which to resolve your problems
  • outcome is agreed

Is family mediation confidential?
Yes. This is a fundamental feature of the process. The mediator will only give information to a third party with your prior written consent. The only exception would be where a child or other person was said or thought to be at risk of serious harm and even then any action to be taken by the mediator with a view to contacting Social Services would normally be discussed in the mediation session.


Can my partner tell the court what we said in family mediation?
No. Discussions that take place in mediation are 'without prejudice'. This means that neither you nor your partner can tell the court what was discussed unless you both agreed to do so. The only exception to this is where there are concerns about serious risks to a child.


What about financial information disclosed during family mediation?
Financial information provided by the parties and considered jointly in mediation can, with the consent of both of you, be made available to the court and this may be necessary to obtain a formal consent court order. It also can save the information being collected again by solicitors so that you don't have a duplication of effort and waste of costs if the mediation comes to an end and you need to continue in another process.


How does family mediation work in practice?
We start with an Intake Meeting with you, and your partner, when each of you can, on your own, discuss the process and whether it is suitable for you. You can then voice your concerns and queries and may at this stage take it no further or alternatively decide to go ahead and use mediation, if so, arrangements would be made for an initial joint meeting with you, your partner and the mediator.

At the initial Joint Meeting the mediator will discuss in detail with both of you what is involved and start getting to know you, your circumstances and the unique details of your relationship. We will help you start gathering information which is fundamental to the process. The atmosphere will be informal and as relaxed as possible. The Mediator will start giving help and guidance as to the future shape and arrangements of the mediation.

After the initial Joint Meeting further sessions will be arranged with both of you. The frequency, number and timing of these is flexible and will depend on the circumstances of your situation which could include matters of particular urgency, the range of issues to be dealt with and communication problems.

It may be necessary during the process for either of you to seek advice on particular points of law, financial matters etc from a solicitor, accountant or other adviser.

If either of you feels the process should cease you can step out. However even if this happens it is quite normal to find that substantial progress has been made towards solving problems.

In most cases the parties continue meeting jointly with the mediator until agreement is reached on how to deal with matters that have been raised. Most Mediations result in a Memorandum of Understanding which sets out what has been achieved. This document can be taken to your solicitors for their advice and assistance in turning it into a separation agreement or binding court Order.


How long does family mediation take?
This very much depends on your particular circumstances; how much has already been agreed, whether your financial affairs are straight forward or are there other complications which will have a bearing on the timescale. Each meeting with the mediator normally lasts about 1½ to 2 hours and if there are financial matters to deal with it is rarely possible to go through everything in fewer than three meetings and most Mediations take at least six sessions if a wide range of issues are involved.

It is up to each of you to decide with the Mediator at the end of a meeting whether you are making headway and want to meet again. In any event the mediation process is usually a lot quicker than going to court.


Are people who go to family mediation satisfied with the results?
A research study carried out by Newcastle University found that 80% of couples reached some form of agreement and the majority were satisfied with the outcome. Mediation was found to make communication easier and a separation or divorce was then less bitter and stressful. Two thirds of those who took part in mediation felt that it had reduced their legal costs and most felt that it had helped them to co-operate as parents where children were concerned.


Do I need a solicitor?
Yes, Mediation is not a substitute for legal advice. Even though a mediator may be a qualified solicitor (s)he will not advise you about whether a particular option is advisable, nor is it the role of the mediator to protect your individual interests. Mediation still usually involves you in seeking legal advice during the process.

Towards the end of the mediation sessions a memorandum of understanding will be drawn up which is a statement of what has been proposed during the mediation. The mediator will suggest that you consult your own solicitors so that you can be advised on the personal consequences of what you have jointly proposed and this will in most cases help the solicitors have the agreement incorporated in a court Order or legally binding agreement, if this is advisable.


Will family mediation be cheaper than going to court?
First of all you must appreciate that mediation does not claim to be a cheap alternative to other methods of resolving disputes and problems. It is conducted by trained professionals who have a great deal of experience of family and relational breakdowns. Because you may be distressed, worried, upset or even angry mediation needs time to be effective and produce results. It is our experience that the cost of mediation can in many cases be cheaper than using court proceedings, but very often there can be other benefits that can be even greater. We feel that for many couples mediation offers the best value for money.


Will family mediation work for me?
The first stage of the process is for you and ideally your partner to arrange to come to see us for a preliminary Intake Meeting. This involves each of you seeing a mediator on your own to discuss the process and as to whether it could work in your circumstances, and be likely to help you both. Each of you would see the mediator for about an hour and the cost of this would be £80 each plus VAT to be paid at the end of the sessions. If for some reason you don't feel the process is suitable for you you can say so, and in a limited number of cases the mediator may advise that mediation is unsuitable. If after this first meeting you and your partner feel happy about using mediation an appointment will be made for a first Joint Meeting.


How much is it going to cost once we have decided to use family mediation?
It depends. However the basic charge is £90 per hour per party plus VAT . The overall cost will, of course, be directly related to the number sessions you need.   Each session is about 1½ hours long, and most mediations will take between three and six sessions. If there are a wide variety of matters to be sorted out then the process can take longer. At the end of a successful mediation the mediator will pull the threads together and produce a memorandum of understanding setting out what is proposed. In most cases this will need to handed to your solicitor to be put into leagally binding agreement.

Our hourly charge covers the mediation sessions and preparing the memorandum of understanding - no further charge is made for preparatory work, administration and discussions between our mediators where appropriate.


Who will do the family mediation?
Our mediators come from different mediation backgrounds; family mediation and family law mediation. It may at times be necessary for mediators from both disciplines to be involved with you or at other times only one. This depends on what skills are needed at a particular stage. Whether one mediator or two is involved in a session the basic hourly charge for the session remains the same.

Zoe Robinson - Zoe is a Solicitor, a partner in Raworths and has specialised as a Family Lawyer since she qualified in 1985. Zoe is a trained Family Mediator and qualifies as a Collaborative Lawyer in 2007. She has been granted a Certificate of Recognition by the Legal Services Commission to deal with all issues in family mediation.

Zoe is the Head of Raworths Service for the Individual Team and has a wide experience of dealing with and resolving family disputes and problems. She is a member of Resolution (formerly the Solicitors Family Law Association) whose Code of Conduct seeks to remove conflict from family disputes wherever this is possible.

Eric Clarkson - Eric's has been a counsellor since 1991 and hold a degree in therapeutic counselling.  He has been a Family Mediator since 2001 and is accredited by the National Family Mediation Service.  He has been granted a Certificate of Recognition by the Legal Services Commission to deal with all issues in family mediation.


How can I contact you?
Telephone Zoe Robinson on 01423 726600, fax 01423 504572, or email zoe.robinson@raworths.co.uk. Alternatively go to our Contact page

 

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